Biblical Ways of Solving the Anger Problem

 

Biblical Ways of Solving the Anger Problem

 

By Nak Moo Jun

 

Introduction

 

Proverb 25:28 says, “Like a city whose walls are broken down is a man who lacks self-control (NIV).” This shows that self-control is a basic virtue required for peaceful and secure life. At the same time, this verse suggests that it is as difficult as defending a city for a person to control his self although the self is fully owned by him. There are several elements that make self-control a challenging job and such elements include lust, anxiety, fear and anger. Particularly because of its impulsiveness and vigorousness, anger may be the most formidable adversary to self-control. The history of anger is as old as Cain (Gn. 44:5) but today’s anger problem seems to grow worse and more prevalent. According to statistics,[1] 64% of people either strongly agree or agree that people in general are getting angrier; one in five of people (20%) say that they have ended a relationship or friendship with someone because of how they behaved when they were angry; and more than one in ten (12%) say that they have trouble controlling their own anger. The anger problem is particularly problematic among Christians and their leaders because they are supposed to be peaceful in all situations and this belief curtails their options in dealing with anger. Thus, this paper purposed to explore anger from a Christian viewpoint and ultimately to suggest how to control anger. For healthy anger management, first we should have a clear understanding of what anger is, from what it comes, and what it results in. We will discuss these issues and, based on the discussion, suggest an anger management method.

 

 

1.      What is anger?

 

The definition of anger or how we understand anger is closely connected to how to control anger. If anger is perceived to be evil or sin we will try to suppress it by all means, but if it is considered one of natural human emotions implanted by God we may have to accept anger as an unavoidable nature and take a different approach in handling it. In this way, the basic definition of anger has a significant effect on the way of anger management. In other words, anger can be managed properly only when it is understood correctly.

 

It is not easy to define anger in a few words. It may be easier to start with the simple question: “Is anger bad?” To this question, some scholars take a neutral position. For example, Mark Cosgrove says that anger is an arousal feeling that people experience in the presence of threatening or frustrating events and, therefore, it is ethically neutral until it is expressed in ways that are inconsistent with scriptural principles.[2] Tim La Haye also says, “Anger in itself is neither good nor bad. It is just an emotion. The problem with anger is the direction in which it leads you.”[3] Going further, Andrew Lester believes that our capacity for anger is one of God’s good gifts intentionally rooted in creation and serving important purposes in human life.[4] These views of anger warn us against the traditional belief that anger is always sinful.

 

In the Bible, however, human anger is mostly treated negatively. For example, Colossians 3:8 says, “But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips (NIV).” The assertiveness of this command leaves no room for anger in the believers’ lives. Moreover, anger has always been included in the list of “the capital vices.”[5] Those who supported these ideas regarded anger as a source of sins. For instance, Gregory the Great taught that anger propagates an army of sins including strife, swelling of mind, insults, clamor, indignation, and blasphemies.[6] These views seem to condemn anger as a mortal vice or the root of evil sins.

 

Still anger is an essential factor of human character. Whether or not it is a sin we have to live with anger. By Thomas Fuller, the inherence of anger in human nature was compared to “part of the sinew of the soul.”[7] Reading the Bible carefully, we can find that anger is something not to be shunned but to be controlled. Proverb 29:11 says, “A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise man keeps himself under control (NIV).” Here the vice is not anger itself but “the full vent of anger” and a wise man is able to control it. Also in Ephesians 4:26, Paul commands, “Be ye angry, and sin not (KJV).” By the majority of the standard New Testament Greet reference books and by many commentators, the first part (“Be ye angry”) is interpreted as a concession rather than as a command.[8] This means that Paul, while not encouraging anger, admits that anger is unavoidable but should be controlled so that it would not evolve into sins.

 

2.      From what does anger come?

 

Robert Jones categorized human anger into “righteous anger” and “sinful anger.”[9] This categorization reflects the cause of anger. Righteous anger is anger arising for divine causes. We can find some examples of righteous anger in the Bible such as Phinehas’ anger against an Israelite man and a Midianite woman for their lewdness before God (Num. 25), Moses’ anger at the Israelites’ idolatry (Ex. 32), and Jesus’ anger in the Temple (Mt. 21). Although these cases represent an extremely pure form of righteous anger, almost every case of anger also involves “justice” or “judgment” in one way or another. Based on this understanding, Robert defined anger as “our whole-personed active response of negative moral judgment against perceived evil.”[10] If we accept the view that anger is ethically neutral or even good, the anger should denote righteous anger.

 

On the contrary, anger itself may be regarded as sinful if it comes from another vice. According to Dennis Okholm, “anger is often the bedfellow of envy, and it is frequently aroused by frustrated greed and lust.”[11] In the Bible, we can find such cases easily including Cain’s anger out of his envy at Abel and King Herod’s anger after having been outwitted by the Magi (Mt. 2:16). This type of anger may be explained properly with another definition of anger by Andrew Lester, according to whom, “Anger is physical mental and emotional readiness to attack whatever threatens our survival.”[12] People have a strong instinct to protect themselves from threats to their life, self-esteem, possessions, relationships, etc., and such instinct naturally leads us to sinful anger.

 

The contrast between righteous anger and sinful anger lies in the fact that the former involves “justice” and the latter does “survival.” However, this contrast is not clear in human life mainly because many times we appeal to justice for our survival and, going further, may distort justice for our own causes. With regard to the sinfulness of the human heart, Jeremiah 17:9 says, “The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure.” If we accept this, it would be safe to say that anger arising from our heart is “almost always” sinful even if it is disguised with “justice” or “religion.”

 

 

3.      How can we control anger?

 

Based on the discussions above, this section suggests a few basic propositions that are useful for us to control anger.

 

A.     A person’s anger is inherent part of his human nature.

 

In solving the anger problem, the biggest obstacle may be denying that we have anger in our heart or condemning ourselves for anger in our heart. Like the first step to solve the sin problem is admitting that I am a sinner, however, the first step to solve the anger problem is admitting that I am an angry person. This is not saying that anger is morally neutral or good. This is saying that anger is not something abnormal and, by saying so, to give us a room to confront and examine the anger problem in cold blood.

 

B.     A person’s anger has its root in himself.

 

Anger is a strong emotion that is easily detectable. Taking anger as a clue, we can fathom down what is hidden deep in our hearts. When Cain was very angry, God said to him, “Why are you angry?” Cain might think that he got angry because of his brother Abel and because of God. However, God helps him to reconsider and to find the cause not in others but in himself. In this sense, anger is a useful sign and starting point for self-examination.

 

C.      Anger can be a problem depending on how it is expressed.

 

Anger becomes a problem practically when it “explodes” orally or behaviorally. In terms of how to vent our anger, there can be a large variety of practical methods including “counting from one to ten.” However, one basic and the most crucial principle is that anger should not be expressed in an explosive way. In order to avoid the burst of anger, we should repent our narrow heart and have a room large enough to hold anger until “the anger languishes and perishes.”[13]

 

D.    Biblical justice is not retributive but redemptive.

 

As we discussed above, anger is closely connected to justice, whether genuine or disguised. The justice taught in the Bible is not retributive but redemptive. In the parable of the prodigal son (Lk. 15), for example, the older son became angry because the father welcomed the prodigal son. He had a just reason for getting angry but his justice was retributive. In contrast, the father says to him, “We had to celebrate and be glad because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.” The father’s justice was redemptive. The fundamental solution for our anger problem is pursuing the redemptive justice of our Father in Heaven and our Lord Jesus Christ who prayed on the cross, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”

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[1] Mental Health Organization, “Boiling Point,” cited July 29 2013. online: http://www.beatinganger.com/anger-statistics

[2] Mark Cosgrove, “Counseling for Anger,” Dallas: Word Publishing, 1988, p. 40

[3] Tim La Haye & Bob Phillips, “Anger Is a Choice,” Grand Rapids, Michigan: Zondervan Publishing House, 1982, p. 14

[4] Andrew Lester, “The Angry Christian: A Theology for Care and Counseling,” Louisville, Kentucky : Westminster John Knox Press, 2003, p. 3

[5] The list of the currernt form includes: pride, envy, sloth, avarice, anger, lust, and gluttony

[6] Dennis Okholm, “To Vent or Not to Vent? – What Contemporary Psychology Can Learn from Ascetic Theology about Anger,” in Care for the Soul (ed. Mark MaMinn & Timothy Phillips; Downers Grove, Illinois: IVP Academic, 2001), 167

[7] Norman Rohrer & Phillip Sutherland, “Facing Anger: How to Turn Life’s Most Troublesome Emotion into a Personal Asset,” Minneapolis: Augsburg Publishing House, p. 8

[8] Robert Jones, “Uprooting Anger: Biblical Help for a Common Problem,” Phillipsburg, New Jersey: P&R Publishing, 2005, p. 15

[9] Ibid, p. 18

[10] Ibid, p. 15

[11] Dennis Okholm, p. 167

[12] Andrew Lester, “Anger: Discovering Your Spiritual Ally,” Louisville, Kentucky : Westminster John Knox Press, 2007, p. 13 

[13] Dennis Okholm, p. 180